Journalling, Part 2

I talked a little bit about journalling in a previous stationery post here.  Yesterday I was talking to my friend, JM, about it and she requested another post about journal writing (my first proper request apart from Amanda saying things like, "Post this tonight, ah!").  Specifically, we discussed writer's block, keeping up the habit and what goes into my journal.

Well, I'm no expert but as always, I can talk about what works for me and what keeps me writing.  So, JM, this one's for you.  

First off, my journal.

I started keeping a journal when I was 12 years old and at first it was nothing more than a way to keep up with my best friend.  Her journal was a lot more detailed than mine, which was filled with scraps and nonsense.  When I got to about 14 though, I hit an angsty, lonely teenage stage.  I was the most uncool kid in my class and had very few friends and my journal became a place for me to work a lot of the loneliness out.  I wrote about things like dealing with overprotective parents who wouldn't let me out after school hours and feeling like I'd never belong.

The journals became more introspective and I also used them as a chance to stretch and test my ideas about good writing.  Until I was about 18, I would still share bits of what I wrote with friends and they would occasionally even scribble in the margins or draw pictures on the last page.  In some ways, it was a stupid adolescent cry for attention.  

Now though, they are extremely private.  Some time this year, I finally got over the roadblock of feeling like someone was reading over my shoulder all the time and started writing exactly what I felt and thought.  It's really, really liberating and I'll try, as best I can, to explain how I do this.

Commitment

I've said before that I don't find it hard to keep coming back to my journal because I don't put any time pressure on myself.  I've gone three months before without writing and come back to it quite easily because knowing that there is no pressure means that I can start again when it feels enjoyable and comfortable for me.

I do understand though, the impetus to keep writing, to cover ground constantly and fluently and I think it's a good one, so here's what works for me:

1)  Make the time and place

This is an absolute must.  Trust me when I say that if you won't make the time and place, then you'll never journal.  Journalling is not something that happens on the fly for most of us.  It's the thing that we'll put on the backburner when there is too much work to bring home or sleep beckons, so making time is the only way that it will happen for many people.

For me, the best time is in the morning before work, but of course it's different for everybody.  I just think that sleep, family time and leisure aren't things I'm willing to procrastinate on, but dawdle over a coffee for 15 minutes before I have to clock in?  Sure.  Instead of playing candy crush or checking Facebook, I just shut everything out and scribble a page or two.  Making time when you're most likely to be open to making an effort (i.e. not right before bed when you're exhausted) can really help.

Having a specific journalling location helps as well.  Mine is a certain 24 hour Starbucks and the moment I walk in, I know I'm in the right frame of mind.  What else can I do besides journal and play with my phone once I arrive anyway?

After all, the best part of having a pre-planned time and, say, arriving at a destination 15 minutes early, means that you won't procrastinate and think "well, I'll do it tomorrow" because you're already there.  

2)  Examine your motivation

I find that if I think about why I keep a journal, I am driven more urgently to do so.  Whenever people tell me they don't have the discipline to keep one, I imagine that maybe they haven't quite decided why yet, or don't feel that they would miss much if they didn't.

For one, you will have a fail-safe record of everything.  Embarrassing as it is, I can look up exactly when I had my first kiss, when I got my braces removed, the biggest fight my best friend and I have had, the things that happened when my grandmother died.  

I was talking to my good friend, Mel Sim, the other day and we were talking about memory and how it fails as one gets older.  She told me that she would dither over throwing things away because the memories that they held would be lost along with them.  I said, "Well, I keep most things in my journal so..." and it hit me that I write because things slip away from me every day.  My childhood home was just demolished in five swings of a wrecking ball and if I did not sit down and write about the exact layout of the rooms as I remember them, the colour of the bathroom tile, they would be gone forever.  No one will ever be able to remind me of how I felt.

If you're really dying to start journal keeping, just think of what you stand to lose when you don't.  Human memory is notoriously fallible.  Something traumatic or joyful happens and I think I'll remember exactly where I was standing and what I was wearing but really, I won't.  And it's entirely possible that one day, I won't be able to hold even a single thought.  So I write it down. 

3)  Set manageable limits

In the more practical realm, some people don't journal because they think that they have neither the time nor wherewithal to sit down and ramble on for pages.  Hey, you don't have to.

What if you told yourself that all you had to do every other day, or even every week, was jot down one paragraph?  One?  Or one line?  That anything beyond that would be a delightful achievement?  Can't be that hard, can it?  If you set a limit that is easily achievable for you, it's likely that it won't be too daunting.  Combined with the certainty of a pre-planned journal writing time, that one paragraph will get written for sure.

I'm garrulous (in case you couldn't tell) so my limit is one page.  And once I get going, I often exceed it.  

4)  Have a subject ready

It took me a while to get used to this, but now I usually have something in mind when I sit down.  This comes under the second session on writer's block.

Clockwise, left to right: I like to draw bunting.  I love quotes about journalling.  This one, about Sylvia Plath says, "The journal of a writer is often like the barre of a ballerina.  She works out in front of a mirror, watching an ideal version of herself do difficult moves, trying to get them right".  I made a plan of my old kindergarten building by memory; it's all I have left.  I like stickers, too.

Writer's block

One of the reasons why it can be so hard to come back to writing a diary is thinking, but what on earth will I write about?  Amanda often stares at my pages in horror and says, "What do you have so much to say about?"

Nothing, really.  But I do have a whole handy set of journal prompts ready.  Before getting into the idea of journal prompts, I feel that it's very important to prime yourself into recognising that NO SINGLE THING is too stupid or unimportant to be written down.  Don't hold yourself back before you've even started.  You can say anything and everything because no one is going to see it.  Okay?  Now.

1)  Lists

When I have a bit of spare time, I make a whole list of lists (hah!).  The items range from the silly to the mundane, and every time I have nothing to write about, I just write a list.  If you expand on the items as you go, you'll find that you have entries that are both quirky and pretty representative of you.

Ones I've really enjoyed include:

10 things I know for sure
5 pet peeves
5 things that I really, really want
10 things I really love
10 things I really hate
The 10 things I would buy if I won the lottery
5 random facts about me
5 songs I've been listening to lately and why

Simple, quick and when I fill lists out with speed, I find that the answers always surprise me.

2)  Prompts

There are specific journal template prompts that you can Google to get you started on a random entry for the day.  Some ones that I've enjoyed include: Working/ Not working and More/Less.  You just split the page down the middle and on one side, write all the things that are working in your life.  On the other half, you talk about the things that are not working out so well.  It can be eye-opening.

I thought I would share my latest Working/Not working list (or the bits that aren't private anyway) from 8th April 2013 as an example:

Working:

1)  Friendships with people in my office.  I just love them.
2)  My parents both being at home (so far).  My father seems a lot happier since my mom quit to be by his side.
3)  Photography (so far).  I'm really enjoying taking random photos of everything.
4)  Getting in regular exercise.

Not working:

1)  I'm not getting enough sleep.
2)  Stressing out about how my students are going to do in their exams.
3)  Managing my emotions.
4)  Frenemy status with Friend X.  It's either on or it's not.
5)  Eating more healthily.

See?  Quick and dirty.

3)  Scene-setting

When all else fails, just describe your surroundings.  Do it in as much detail as you like, and if it doesn't segue into anything else, at least you'll have a snapshot of the moment.  I start SO many entries this way and they always end up being quite full.    

Here is an example from 3rd May, 2013, written in my house (coincidentally I found a photo I took on that very day):

"Jammy Dodgers, Japanese cheesecake and tea.  It's very pleasant to be alone at the table, the rain falling lightly on the zinc behind me.  That was part of the magic of getting this house - waking up to rainfall that was no longer muted by the 12 floors above us..."

Even if you don't get beyond that, it's a pretty sweet memory to have.

4)  Introduce yourself

If you haven't written about yourself in detail for a long time, go ahead and do it.  Where are you in life right now?  Do you see a future ahead?  How do you feel about yourself?  Be prepared for some serious navel gazing.

5)  Have a topic ready

I keep a couple of yellow post its in the back of my journal.  The moment I see something noteworthy, I scribble a note on a post it and then when I sit down to write, I launch into the topic.  We all have things we're fascinated by and if I see one and write it down quickly, then it won't fade the way it would if I said "I'll remember this for later."

Today, for instance, I watched a little boy throw a tantrum in Guardian pharmacy.  (I am absolutely transfixed by kids throwing tantrums.  I like to see how many stops they pull out and what their parents do.  I enjoy when they start to fake cry without so much as a single tear.  I like it when the parents firmly and sensibly win - I do a little fist pump for them.  I love it when parents handle the situation with good humour, and even more so when the kids come round.)

He really wanted a pack of mini M and Ms (me too kid, me too) and tried to get away with stuffing them into his mother's handbag.  By the time his mother had dragged him out of Guardian, he was squatting on the floor and squalling like a piglet.  I immediately scribbled "Guardian tantrum" on my post it.  Voila.  

This may be the most massively long thing that I've ever written, so I'll stop here.  If anybody with journal writer's block stumbles across this, I hope at least one of the prompts helps or that you enjoy making a couple of lists today.

My main suggestion though, is try it for one month.  Just one month; it's not Nanowrimo, for God's sake.  A paragraph a day if you can, or every other day if you must, even if it's just writing a quote down.  Do it for a month and go over the pages. 

Read them and laugh at things you found important in the moment. 

Savour your words on paper. 

Ask yourself if you'd like to try it for one month more.  If you do, then have at it, one month at time. 

If you don't, no matter.  It was a fun little experiment. 

You'll always have that one month in 2013 for keeps.

Whatever it is, you sure as hell won't regret it.