Calling a spade

I've understood for a long time that it's important to be at peace with yourself and to fully accept the idea of a life alone.  For everyone.  After all, minds change, people die and nothing gold can stay.  But I've never quite had to put it into practice.

I don't mean that I've never felt lonely.  Rather, and I'm ashamed to admit this, but even when I've known in the back of my head that we're all one-man guys, and even when things have been the opposite of okay, there has always been someone, somewhere that has made me think: Hmm.  Dying alone?  Maybe not today.

Things are different now and, I don't think, in a bad way.  But for lots of us, it's an adjustment.  To realise that no matter how close your family and friends are, it's necessary to find eventual peace with yourself.  We have to be okay with that.

Every time there is upheaval in my life, I find comfort in starting new things.  New hobbies, meeting new people, new blogs.  It's hard to let go.  People love agency, comfort, control.  We're a race who names our hurricanes, for Pete's sake.  People aren't built to go solo but sometimes life happens that way and for self-preservation, it's useful to be prepared.

Often, the most important comfort zone is the self.  No matter who we love or who we're loved by, it's important to take the time to remember who we are and face this slow search for peace, or whatever, alone.